[The morning of Dylan's birthday, he will wake up to a message waiting for him because a challenge was issued and it cannot go unmet. And not just unmet. Jaskier thinks a challenge like that merits exceeding the expectation of just meeting it.]
Alright, this next one is my latest masterpiece and it's called Dylan Is The Coolest.
[There's a count after that. Which may seem as though Jaskier is committing to the bit that this is a snippet of a live show and to some extent, he is. Except that there is actually a small musical troupe of demons he's actually counting for. Jaskier still thinks they're a bit mediocre for his tastes, but it rounds out the sound and yes, is a way of flaunting what Jaskier can accomplish musically even with only a matter of days to develop it.]
[Despite the title, the verses don't appear to support it at all even if the chorus is the poetic version of No seriously, he's really cool. Trust me! He's really, really cool. The song is largely a playful roast that doesn't point out any genuine flaws or attempts at picking at potential insecurities so much as it fondly teases Dylan for his lame jokes and even more painful pick-up lines and "smooth" attempts at recovery when he's misspoken. The last verse is actually more complimentary in recognition that the listener doesn't appear convinced. Except Jaskier frames it as though he's struggling and grasping at straws to come up with anything to keep in line with the tone of the rest of the song. The music supports this with a few notes being held longer than necessary and unexpected rests as though to reflect Jaskier's drawn-out thinking. But Dylan receives his compliments as there's a small admission that sure, the jokes may be lame, but he's still able to put a smile on someone's face. And, alright, his lines are really bad, but he is quite good-looking. And as for how he is in bed... Jaskier pretends to trail off as if entirely lost in thought, the music similarly fading out for a moment just before he can finish the innuendo as a compliment. And rather than finish it, the chorus comes back to finish the song with more enthusiasm than all its other previous iterations.]
[At the song's end, Jaskier adds just a brief message before ending the voicemail.]
May this year be filled with great joy and laughter, darling. A most happy birthday to you.
[ Dylan doesn't get the message right away as he's busy sleeping until well past noon. But when he finally does get his ass up the first thing he does is start to brush his teeth. The second thing, check his device to see if anything interesting is happening on the network. Doubtful, but you know...still gotta check. Dylan's surprised to find a voicemail waiting for him. The surprise grows even more when he hears it's from Jaskier.
So he brushes his teeth and listens...and he's just blown away by what Jaskier has managed to do in such a short space of time. He wrote a full song, and this isn't even something short and sweet. It's a whole production along with what sounds like a group of musicians, all personalized to him. Dylan's been to a couple concerts where the local bands would shout him out on his birthday and play a song in his honor. But that was always something they had written and wasn't personalized in any way. Jaskier has gone above and beyond...and it's honestly the coolest thing anyone has ever done for him.
Dylan laughs along with the jokes. At points, he nearly spits out his mouthful of toothpaste from the punchlines -- but he can't stop grinning ear to ear. When the message ends, he immediately replays it as he goes off to rinse and drop his toothbrush in the holder, humming along to the catchy as fuck chorus before returning to his bed and flopping back on it. With the song's second conclusion, Dylan pulls up Jaskier's name and shoots him off a text. ]
take me now, music man 💖💖💖
i don't think the day could get any better from here.
might as well go back to bed and end on this high point 😍
Not to criticize (since it is your day after all and you are free to do as you please), but if you were to return to bed, would that not mean you slept the near-entirety of your birthday away?
Doesn't exactly give me bragging rights for having perfected the day then, now does it?
There are other possibilities besides just demons. You might even perhaps find them worth braving the risk of a demon orgy for. 😘😘
But that is completely understandable. It was one thing when they kept it to just a few rooms. It's been a struggle these past few days finding someplace where I can reliably play. 😤😤😤
Now, Dylan, I've already given you a song. Are you really going to be so greedy as to try for another present so shortly after saying thank you? 🤔
You seduced me once, I will give you that, but you're going to have to try a bit harder than that even if it is your birthday. I should be offended that you think I would be so loosely moraled! 😘😘😘
oh, jaskier the greatest and most talented bard i know if beauty were time, you'd be eternity would you do me the honor of coming to spend some time with me on my b-day?
is that better? you want more lines? cuz i got more lines 😚
Setting aside the fact saying I'm the greatest and most talented bard you know is akin to a sister claiming her only younger brother is her favorite younger brother, I can't very well overlook your efforts here. 😍😍
I suppose I can spare a few hours of my time as a reward. 😏
So, put away your lines, you scoundrel. You've already managed to charm me once more. Damn your wit and good looks!
[And sure enough, a while later, there's a knock at Dylan's door and a bard on the other side of it. Jaskier greets Dylan when he opens his door with a wide, bright smile.]
Ah, look! He arises from bed after all, [he teases, pushing off the doorframe.] I thought perhaps you might decide in the time it took me to get here that sleep may be better given your fondness for it.
[And yet, even as Jaskier teases, he still leans in for a kiss. Chaste and sweet as one hand finds the small of Dylan's back.]
[ Dylan pulls open the door, giving Jaskier an appreciative once over. And to his comment, he retorts: ]
I even showered and everything.
[ He shakes his still-damp hair like a dog. Fortunately, it's dried enough to not send droplets spraying at Jaskier. A smile stretches across his face following the kiss and his arms casually drape around Jaskier's shoulders, wrists hanging limply. In all honesty, Dylan didn't expect such casual affection. Not that he expected Jaskier to remain at a distance because they were always going to be friends, but he had managed to convince himself what happened that night was probably a one night stand.
It's nice to know Jaskier's affection lasts longer than a single evening. ]
Lucky you. You're worth the effort.
[ And then Dylan straight up ducks his head so Jaskier can get a whiff of his strands. ]
You like it, though? I got my hands on some eucalyptus and peppermint shampoo. My scalp still has the happy tingles.
[Jaskier takes Dylan up on the offer and hums his agreement that he does, indeed, like the scent in his hair. After though, he takes a moment to brush his fingers through Dylan's hair to move it back into place from his earlier shaking.]
Now, however will you possibly best these lengths you've gone to in the future? [he teases.] You start slacking and I'm going to have no choice, but to assume the worst. Then I shall be terribly heartbroken. After all, how am I supposed to cope with losing the affection of The Coolest, hm?
[ Dylan smiles, vibrant and carefree. His hands slip away from Jaskier's shoulders to fall on his chest and drum a brief alternating pattern against it. ]
Good news for you is people and all beings are just balls of infinite possibilities. You never know how I'll surprise you next~
[ He leans in, brushing a kiss to Jaskier's lips before he saunters away toward his unmade nest of a bed -- the covers practically an invitation to return to them. He pats the space beside him. ]
I still can't believe you actually did the song. I mean, I believe you were capable. It's just....I didn't think you'd actually do it.
[ The smile on Dylan's face is still bright, but this time there's something genuinely touched about it -- about the effort Jaskier went to in order to make this day special. Not knowing anyone here, it's not like he could have a big birthday bash. He figured it would pass quietly -- maybe he would mention it at the kitchen to get a cupcake made for him or something. But Jaskier made it memorable. Perhaps one of his most memorable gifts. It's just...
[Jaskier returns the kiss as its lightly pressed to his lips, but allows Dylan to slip away back to his bed with a smile. Balls of infinite possibilities isn't exactly how Jaskier would be likely to put it—he absolutely would probably find something a bit more flowery than that—but it's apt all the same. Certainly not a perspective that Jaskier finds himself disagreeing with, in any case. And... Well, after months of being surrounded by people who only ever see the negative, who assume that any holding onto hope is born of naivety and foolishness? It's a breath of fresh air. As Dylan remains so consistently to be for Jaskier.]
[Once Dylan is settled, Jaskier takes up the space offered to him, nestling in close to him.]
You're not the first to say as much to me. And I can't exactly say I fault you for assuming I wouldn't. I am world-renowned where I'm from and so, it's assumed I would only sing of greatness, be it people or deeds. [After all, taking a monster who hunts monsters and making him now into one of the greatest heroes of the Continent? It's ambitious to say the very least. It would be easy to assume Jaskier would be bored by more mundane matters except there's one flaw with that assumption.] But how quickly everyone forgets that while true I sing of greatness, I find greatness everywhere in the world around me.
[Nothing is truly mundane when one always looks at the world with wonder in their eyes.]
[ The warmth of Jaskier's body pressed to his is nice. His hand teases along Jaskier's spine with a gentle upward motion. ]
That's because you look for it. Not everyone's gonna see what you see, even after hearing your music. But some will. And it's nice you can share that greatness with others.
[ He shifts across Jaskier for a moment, reaching into a drawer where he pulls out a couple of bottles of nail polish. Clearly, he had been poking around the mansion and might have swiped these from one of the makeover counters. But he figures they won't miss them. The colors range from black to pastel purples, blues and pinks. Dylan takes a moment to bring each bottle up to Jaskier's outfit, trying to find the best fit and ultimately settles on the pink. He takes that one and the black and then gives each bottle a good shake. ]
Do you find it limiting being stuck here with roughly about a hundred people? I mean, back home you had a whole world of people to sing about and adore. Here, it's like...well, probably more people went to one of your shows back home than are here for redemption.
[ It might seem almost claustrophobic compared to what Jaskier is used to. But Dylan is genuinely curious about Jaskier's opinion. And although Dylan currently has both bottles open and is working on applying them in an alternating pattern on his nails (black, pink, black, pink, black) -- he's fully listening to what Jaskier's saying. It's just hard for Dylan to ever sit still terribly long. ]
[Jaskier scoots himself down a little lower to assist Dylan when he reaches across him to get into his nightstand, settling back into place once Dylan has as well.]
Well, considering the extent of my catalog that's about one man alone, I should hope I don't find it limiting, [he says, answering Dylan's question while watching him apply the varnish to his nails. Despite his own curiosity about what it is Dylan's doing, Jaskier still doesn't provide him with a shallow answer. As with anything to do with his art, Jaskier is perpetually thoughtful on the matter.] But your assertion also isn't true. I rarely play to a crowd so large save the times I've been invited to court or festivals or some other such celebration, and while it is undeniably good coin and I would never turn down the opportunity, they are not to my preference. I play in taverns all over the Continent, some of which are in towns so small, most could not tell you even which kingdom they belong and all I manage to earn is a roof over my head for the night and food in my belly.
[Jaskier, it would seem, is that hypothetical indie artist who managed to enter the mainstream without losing the intimacy of his shows and is able to maintain those smaller venues without some exorbitant charge attached to it.]
Some consider my work to be banal. Pandering, I believe, is a word that's been used. But those are the words of men who would claim someplace as theirs and yet deem the populace unworthy or incapable of understanding their music. [He wrinkles his nose at that, as though his opinion on the matter weren't obvious.] Why should the farmer not be able to experience all joy and beauty in this world as much as his lord? I've never found a satisfactory answer to that. So, let my music be banal and pandering if that's the case! I'd rather that than find myself trapped, playing the same five or so songs to a lord that hardly pays them any mind until by his grace I ought to find myself welcome to play a few melodies from his childhood that reminds him of glorious days when he was not fat or grey.
[Jaskier sighs a little then, not quite sad but certainly with a sense of longing.]
But I suppose that is what I miss about home relative to here. Aside from the winter months, I had the whole of the Continent to travel as much and as far as I pleased. Difficult as it was at times—and especially so recently with the constant ravaging and threat of war—I've always been most happy out there in the world. But here, I find myself... [Jaskier trails off a moment as he tries to find the right word.] Caged. There's so very little that can even be traveled that I believe this is the most still I've been since I was a boy and it was only my academics that ever allowed me to travel beyond my family's land.
[It leaves his wanderlust unsated and stirs a sense of restlessness within him whenever he allows himself to think on it.]
[ Dylan's eyebrows raise and he pauses what he's doing long enough to give Jaskier a look. Because in his opinion? A hundred people is a small, intimate performance. And most bars fitted for performances, or 'taverns' if you will, allowed that many people to fit inside comfortably. But he supposes that might be a difference between the past and the present. In the present, it's easy to load into a car and drive a distance to reach said bar. In Jaskier's day and age, probably every town (big or small) had a bar.
Dylan goes back to his nails to finish off the first hand, curling them near his lips when he's done to gently blow on them. ]
I guess that's the good thing these days. Music can be recorded and reach everyone. It doesn't have to come from one kind bard willing to cater to a wide ranging audience. You lose the authenticity of a live performance with recordings but you gain the ability to listen whenever and wherever you want.
[ He pushes the bottles of polish toward Jaskier and holds out his unpainted hand -- the hint being that he'd like Jaskier to do the task for him while the other hand dries. But Jaskier likely knows Dylan enough by now to know it wouldn't bother him if Jaskier would rather not. ]
But yeah. I'd bet you're getting pretty stir-crazy here. From what people said, you guys were basically stuck in that hotel for a long time until God destroyed it, right? You at least liking this change of scenery? The whole mansion vibe?
[Jaskier only hesitates a moment when Dylan subtly asks him to paint his other hand. While no stranger to applying cosmetics to others, this particular one is rather new to Jaskier. But he assumes it's not of particular consequence to Dylan if it's a masterful application or not, so he takes Dylan's hand and sets to work in mimicking what he saw Dylan do just moments ago and maintaining his alternating pattern.]
I'm afraid it doesn't feel all like that much of a change to me. It's larger and a bit nicer and the staff is more accommodating. So if I had my choice between the hotel or here, I would choose here, but a gilded cage is still a cage. [He doesn't speak of it with any sort of doom and gloom in his voice, just more a statement of fact. They are just as confined in this mansion as they were back in the hotel, and so the change in scenery hardly feels like much of a change at all to him.] Ah, but you don't need my complaints today. While I imagine there are probably other ways you'd prefer to celebrate your birthday, this mansion is certainly an upgrade from the alternative. Your own private room, a waitstaff ready and willing to wait on you hand and foot...
[He grins at Dylan.]
I hope you've made at least one absurd request of the staff.
I'm new enough I haven't gotten tired of the scenery yet.
[ He smiles, watching Jaskier apply the coats of nail polish with careful ease. Really, what can't his nimble fingers do? ]
It helps that there are some real hotties here. And the hottest of hotties happens to be in my bed. What request could I make of the waitstaff that's better than that?
[ Dylan winks. He hasn't harassed the waitstaff, although Jaskier's suggestion certainly gives him ideas. ]
Oh. Would it be completely terrible of me to request like a massive, three-tiered cake? With piped flowers and rainbow colored icing? Funfetti, of course. Because that's the queer of cakes. Oh my god, you probably haven't had funfetti yet, I'm realizing! Now I gotta do this to share a slice of the modern world with you. It's sickeningly sweet and you'll probably hate it, but consider it a welcome to American Culture -- land of excessive sugar and unhealthy habits.
[There's a lot of what Dylan says that Jaskier can't completely follow. But Jaskier doesn't get bogged down in not completely understanding when he understands enough to get the gist and smiles instead at Dylan's sudden enthusiasm with his genuinely absurd demand.]
And how do you know I would hate it? [Jaskier raises his chin a little at Dylan with a grin.] Don't you pride yourself on being "sickeningly sweet?" I didn't exactly hesitate in having a taste of you, now did I?
[ A memory that certainly brings a tingle to his skin in all the right places. As the final coat of nail polish is applied, he brings his fingers back to gently blow across them. ]
And it was definitely an event.
[ Dylan hardly remembers much about that boat ride beyond what happened beneath that blanket. He scoots in to tuck himself against Jaskier's side, using his shoulders to nudge Jaskier's arm around him while he keeps his hands away just long enough for nails to continue drying. ]
Careful, though. I'm gonna fall for you before you know it and then what are you gonna do? You won't be able to get rid of me, much to your detriment. And then if Ryan ever happens to wind up in hell, he'd be so jealous.
[ There's a smile on his lips when he says it. A smile that says he's not at all serious. Because for one, Ryan wouldn't care more than likely. And two, Dylan also doesn't think Jaskier would care if he did fall for him.
Which....he kinda already has, so too late on that end. ]
[Jaskier lifts his arm when he's nudged, allowing Dylan to tuck himself in close while his nails dry. But at the insinuation that he isn't already head over heels for Jaskier, Jaskier's nose crinkles, and his free hand is placed over his own heart as though Dylan's delivered a fatal blow.]
You're going to fall for me? I gave you a wonderful night, a song, and all my best charm, and you still haven't fallen for me? [Jaskier scoffs a little with his mock-offense, shaking his head.] Either you are the most fickle person I've ever met or you're full of absolute shit.
[His hand comes away from his own chest and he waves it dismissively.]
Regardless, I'm generous enough that I'm more than willing to make him the most envious man in all of Hell at the very least. Perhaps across all the possible worlds if you're kind to me.
[ There's a smile that stays on his face. A smile that finds a home there very easily in Jaskier's company -- at his mock offense and his proclamation of generosity. Dylan wouldn't give it the words for a while to come, if only because society had conditioned him to never come across too clingy. The most he would do is acknowledge it as a crush, even if it runs deeper than that. Which is probably too much because in essence, he barely knows Jaskier beyond him being a fun guy to be around. That too much gene is kicking in hard when it comes to his feelings. ]
All those things were wonderful, but you haven't even taken me on a proper date. How am I supposed to fall for you without a date? We're doing all of this backwards. So when we get back to Penance and there are a multitude of burned out buildings to go, I expect a proper date, Jaskier. And only then will I fall for you.
[ He teases, turning his head to press a kiss to his lips. ]
For now, though...I don't mind getting kinda improper for my birthday.
[Jaskier's just a moment from pointing out that dating isn't really a thing where he comes from and yet, plenty of people fall for him everyday, but the point is abandoned when Dylan opts to kiss him. He makes a pleased hum before they part from one another. Jaskier steals another, little kiss to the corner of Dylan's mouth before he makes his little hint as to what else he would like from Jaskier for his birthday.]
Improper, hm? [He withdraws his arm from around Dylan's shoulders to instead straddle Dylan. As he speaks, Jaskier's hands wander along his torso over the top of his t-shirt.] Well. Normally, I would say absolutely not at the suggestion. After all, you apparently haven't fallen in love with me despite my best efforts. What sort of person would I be to fall into bed with such a cad? My reputation is already in shambles as it is after that grand seduction on the boat.
[Jaskier leans forward to kiss Dylan, the kiss lingering and slow. Jaskier deepens the kiss as his hands find the hem of his shirt, lifting it to slip beneath and find warm skin. He traces little patterns along Dylan's lower stomach. He breaks off the kiss, but doesn't wander very far.]
But since it's your birthday, [he says with a pleased sigh,] I think we can make an exception...
[Jaskier jogs the short distance to the bottom of the stairs leading up to the rooms upon spotting him, but stops there rather than following Dylan up further.]
[He made the decision to give Dylan a bit of space after... Well. Everything. The other night. It seemed the right thing to do in giving Dylan the breathing room to recover and figure out how he wanted to talk about it further, assuming that he wanted to talk about it at all. But as the day began stretching itself into two... There was taking space and then there was silence, and it was beginning to feel increasingly like the latter. Jaskier would have thought after at least a day there would be something from Dylan. Even if it wasn't talking about the whole werewolf thing, at least a silly little text or something. Not this complete and utter silence as though Dylan had never been.]
I was beginning to think you managed to make it back home. [It's not as direct a call out as it possibly could be, but Jaskier doesn't particularly feel inclined to rub Dylan's nose in it so much as let him know that he knows when he's being avoided. He also isn't looking to ambush the poor man either, offering Dylan a bit of choice in the matter as he asks,] Do you have a few minutes? Or shall I try to find you after my set?
[He hadn't come here looking for Dylan specifically, after all. Most of the time if Jaskier's at the hotel, it's to see Geralt or Yennefer or someone else who still resides here. Otherwise, it's purely for the opportunity to play to a crowd.]
[ Dylan flinches upon hearing his name, wondering for a moment if it would be extremely shitty to pretend like he didn't hear. Does he think Jaskier hates him? No. It crossed his mind Jaskier would in the immediacy of the moment. But he'd had time alone to read and reread those texts. Jaskier's concern and care bled through them. So, no. He was certain Jaskier didn't hate him. But that wasn't the same as wanting to go back to the relationship they had. Why would Jaskier want to make out with a part time monster?
Dylan closes his eyes and lets out a breath, turning to face Jaskier -- one hand anxiously rubbing his opposite arm just beneath the tattoo. ]
Oh. No. Still here.
[ His brows furrow and his eyes drop to his sneakers. ]
I'm actually, um...
[ He grapples to come up with some excuse. It's not that he doesn't want to see Jaskier. It's more that he doesn't want to face his shame. His shame in what he is. His shame for not saying something sooner. His shame for worrying Jaskier, not just over him but over Geralt and Laura as well.
Unfortunately, he fails to come up with something timely enough. Dylan finally looks up to meet Jaskier's gaze. ]
You shouldn't be late for your set, man. Go and dazzle your captive audience.
[With the lack of something to fill in as to why he can't talk to Jaskier now, Jaskier easily suspects Dylan isn't all that busy in reality. But that's alright, he supposes. He can understand wanting a little more time first because it really isn't his intention to ambush Dylan and if that makes it easier to talk later, then that's not such a bad thing. So, he nods a little in both acknowledgment and understanding, and remains unoffended by the very clumsy way Dylan tries to avoid any conversation. Rather than turning and walking away, Jaskier makes the small trek up the stairs until he's on the step just below Dylan and into his own hand, Jaskier takes the hand that was just anxiously rubbing Dylan's arm.]
I'll look for you after then. [Leaning up slightly, he presses a kiss to Dylan's cheek.] Text me if you're not going to be in your room, yeah?
[Jaskier smiles at him then, giving his hand a light squeeze before he turns and makes his way back down the stairs. He holds Dylan's hand until the physical distance caused by his descent makes their fingertips slip from one another. The sudden, unprompted affection may appear somewhat of an ambush of its own. Perhaps it is. Jaskier wouldn't exactly have much of an argument to provide for why it's not, after all. But Jaskier would prefer it be considered an ambush of its own than allowing Dylan to stew on whatever he imagines Jaskier might say or do later. Or, well... Jaskier imagines Dylan is liable to still stew. But hopefully, a touch to the hand and a kiss to his cheek could provide him with a little relief. Maybe Dylan can be simply nervous rather than dreading what was to come or fearing the worst.]
[ His eyes linger on the hand that's captured by Jaskier and he doesn't lift it when Jaskier presses that kiss to his cheek. Does he get a choice in the matter here? What if he chose to wallow in misery for another night? His shoulders sag and it takes until Jaskier's already a few steps away, the break in their touch, for Dylan to work up enough courage to say what he has to say. ]
Look. You don't have to keep hanging around me out of pity or something. Like some gangly stray mutt you keep feeding. Only turns out that gangly mutt is pretty fucking feral and will definitely bite the hand that feeds it. And why stop at the hand when it can go for the throat, too?
[ He gets a bit queasy thinking about it and grasps the banister to steady himself. ]
I'm a monster, Jaskier. And maybe I killed some things, too. I don't know. There were a whole lot of parts and blood around that clearing when I came to in the morning.
[ And Dylan wasn't exactly keen to ask Geralt for the deets, mostly because part of him didn't want to know what happened. Ignorance in this case was bliss. But ignorance also ate at his conscience for the past couple days and haunted his dreams at night. He sighs. ]
[Jaskier stops when Dylan speaks, looking back at him over his shoulder. He listens patiently, giving Dylan his full attention. Little changes in Jaskier's expression, too. There is no surprise because he already anticipated something along these lines would come up. He isn't angry. He isn't shocked. And he doesn't look at Dylan with an ounce of pity. Once Dylan's done speaking, Jaskier turns himself around properly to face Dylan.]
Well. Let's get one thing straight, shall we? You, good sir, are not a monster. [Jaskier holds up a hand.] Before you go accusing me of deluding myself, I know. I know. [His hand drops back down to his side.] It's arguable that for twelve perhaps even thirteen nights out of the year, you might very well be considered a monster. But a monster wouldn't have called me that night, Dylan. [Jaskier starts walking up the steps to rejoin Dylan again.] A monster wouldn't have been trying to put as much distance between himself and everyone in this hotel.
[This time, Jaskier stops on the same step as Dylan, but rather than taking his hand, Jaskier caresses his cheek to encourage Dylan to look at Jaskier rather than averting his eyes.]
A monster wouldn't blanch at the thought of hurting me or anyone else.
There may now be one night a month that I don't particularly wish to be in the same room as you. And I do wish you didn't have to go through all of this because it isn't fair that you should. But nothing else has changed. [Jaskier takes his hand from Dylan's cheek to clap him on the shoulder, giving it a light squeeze.] So, whatever little arguments you've managed to construct over the past few days, let me go ahead and tell you, there isn't any point in saying them to me.
Because you, my dear cad, made me fall in love with you. That means unless you intend to tell me to fuck off, I'm not going anywhere. And even then, I'm not sure you'll have much luck with that. [Jaskier looks away from Dylan for a moment as his expression shifts to one of mild disgust.] I mean, if Jazzybear hasn't managed to scare me off, I don't know what possibly could.
[ Dylan isn't much of a crier. Even when that night back home became it's most terrifying, he didn't shed a tear. He supposes he was more in a perpetual state of shock and survival for it to really count against him. But in general, he's not the sort to be moved to tears -- not out of coldness but just because he'd rather smile when moved, feel immense joy with a warmth in his chest and a light in his eyes. And yet when Jaskier touches his cheek with unflinching hesitation and asserts he's not a monster, there's an unfamiliar sting in the back of his eyes. A sting that causes his lips to purse and his lashes to fall rapidly.
He's not sure where he falls on the topic. Yeah, he'd like to believe he was only a monster one night out of the month, but the truth is -- it's always a part of him. When he can't go swimming or take a bath because he's afraid to be submerged in water. When he touches anything silver and gets burned. When he gets hurt and heals immediately. The curse is always there. It doesn't only make itself known one night of the month. But it does mean a lot that Jaskier can look at him and not see a monster.
A breath escapes him and he glances to the side only for that gaze to immediately snap back toward Jaskier as he just -- did he just...was that--? Did he say he fell in love with Dylan? Was it a joke? Dylan always joked about making Jaskier love him, so maybe it was a joke to make him feel better? Or maybe.....
No. It couldn't be, right? ]
Uh, excuse you. Jazzybear is cute and the only thing you should be doing is thanking me for that adorable nickname.
[ A smile faintly touches his lips before he takes a step forward to slide his arms beneath Jaskier's, elbows bending so his fingers can rest on Jaskier's shoulders from behind. It's not an embrace of affection -- arms wrapped around one another. It's an embrace of caution and fear and tentativeness. It's an embrace Jaskier could easily escape if he's really not comfortable. But it's also one that tips his hand -- that shows how afraid Dylan is and even a request for protection. Even if there's not much Jaskier can do, maybe he can still keep Dylan from losing himself. ]
Sorry. I'm keeping you, aren't I?
[ But even as he says it, he doesn't make a move to let go of Jaskier, chin settling on his shoulder. ]
[As Dylan moves in and his hands settle on Jaskier's shoulders, Jaskier's hand at Dylan's shoulder releases it to wrap that arm around his shoulders while his other arm settles firmly around Dylan's middle. He turns his head just enough to give Dylan's temple a quick peck before resting his head against Dylan's.]
They can wait.
[Much like Dylan, there isn't really any attempt to let him go. He isn't trying to rush Dylan through the embrace, but rather allowing him to take shelter there as long as he needs it. And he needs it. Jaskier knows without question our doubt that Dylan really needs it. The look of barely contained tears in his eyes when Jaskier refused to accept the notion that he ought to keep his distance spoke to Dylan's fears and the pain of all this. If Jaskier could take it away with this embrace, he would. But Jaskier knows he doesn't have any ability to help with this. Still, he talks to Dylan about possibilities, trying to bolster a little more hope within him about his future and that this curse doesn't need to define him or his life.]
I'm not sure how much can ultimately be done to end your curse since it's a bit different from the cases of lycanthropy back home, but Geralt says that every curse has a condition for breaking them. So, don't you start giving up on yourself to this curse just yet. We can talk more with Geralt about it sometime. Or Yennefer, if you like. She's a... Ah, well, she's incredibly terrifying. I cannot emphasize that enough. But she's a very powerful and skilled sorceress. Even if she can't figure out a cure, she could perhaps make like a proper witch and find a potion that might weaken you or something on the nights you're going to transform and make you less of a danger.
But regardless, no matter what happens from today forward, no more talk of abandoning you, yeah? I'm not going anywhere.
[ Dylan's willing to accept the help of Jaskier's companions. He's not so married to the belief that his curse is a certain way and there's no other way around breaking it. Laura might be, but she would probably also be open to at least looking for an alternative. But his hopes aren't so high -- which is maybe a byproduct of feeling so down in the aftermath or maybe just him being a realist. For a while, he says nothing and soaks in the warmth of this embrace, a balm to soothe his broken spirit. ]
I need you to make me a promise then, Jaskier.
[ Slowly, reluctantly, Dylan inches back so he can meet Jaskier's gaze. His expression is uncharacteristically somber because this is the thing Dylan fears the most. This is the thing that will make him a monster more than the transformation itself. He pulls in a shaky breath. ]
You can't let me hurt anyone. Whether that's finding a place for me to chain myself up or calling Geralt up to stand guard or even one of Yennefer's potions. If I wake up and find a mangled body that I was responsible for...I don't think I could take it.
[Jaskier purses his lips a little at the requested promise. It's not that he doesn't want to make the promise. Even without Dylan emphasizing it to be as important as he is now, Jaskier knows how important it is. Were their positions reversed, Jaskier would probably plead with Dylan to make the same promise. But the trouble is perhaps less with the promise itself and more where they are. If there is one thing that Jaskier's learned in his time here, it's that Hell does eventually take matters into its own hands. Whatever it is you might be trying to avoid or run from, it will find a way to dig it out. There is simply no reason to think this might be an exception.]
[And yet, even knowing that reality, Jaskier doesn't want to crush Dylan's tenuous hope either. Jaskier doesn't know what better choice in this situation is and although he doesn't act upon it, Jaskier feels the impulse to hold onto Dylan tighter as he's weighing it out. But then again, perhaps because of that impulse, he knows what the better choice is after all. A pretty lie may feel better in the moment, but what happens if what Jaskier fears could happen comes to pass? What if this place leaves them in a situation where Dylan loses control without warning and there isn't enough time to put up any sort of barrier between himself and others? The lie won't have meant anything then. If anything, it can only make that worse.]
I'll do everything that I can, Dylan. I promise. As long as I can help it, I won't let you hurt anyone.
[It's not the exact promise that Dylan was necessarily asking him to make, but it's the most honest version of it. If they can figure something else besides running blindly into the woods for the upcoming cycle, then that will be a good first step. They can start to figure something out beyond that for when Hell does inevitably say fuck it to whatever carefully laid plans they have.]
We'll do whatever it takes.
[Including Geralt taking on the grim task of putting Dylan down if that's what ends up being needed. But Dylan already knows that or he wouldn't have called the other night and asked for Jaskier to send him.]
[ It's not the promise Dylan wants, no. But even he recognizes the impossibility of what he's asking Jaskier. And while Dylan would hardly place any of the blame on Jaskier if there turned out to be little he could do, he can understand why Jaskier would not want to commit to a promise he can only try his best to uphold in a place that tends to make sure everyone gets their fair share of suffering. He offers a smile, faint and appreciative. Even this much means a lot. Jaskier owes him nothing, and yet he's done nothing but try to be there ever since Dylan called him that night. ]
Thank you.
[ He steps in and plants a kiss on the side of Jaskier's cheek. A moment of affection, plain and simple. It's chaste and light and delicate as thin glass. Dylan seems only a hair's breadth away from shattering like said glass as well. He steps into his own space again, opposite fingers rubbing at the edge of his palm where the bite had originally happened. ]
Anyway, I kept you long enough. There are more important people than me. Go on and be your sexy rocker self. I'll be in my room if you still plan on stopping by later. I'd come to your show, but.
[ He swallows, eyes flicking toward the top of the stairs. ]
I don't like.... Being out. For long. Since that night.
[There is, of course, a part of Jaskier that wants to push Dylan. It's not like him to be so withdrawn and reclusive, and it would do him good to start reclaiming what was more his norm. And Jaskier would like to think he perhaps felt safe enough around Jaskier that even if he was in a small crowd, it wouldn't be so terrible. That perhaps he could just lose himself in the music and not think about all of that for a little while. But Jaskier also recognizes that may simply be too much too soon right now. In fact, it most likely is and regardless of how safe he might feel with Jaskier, that's not going to be enough to counteract whatever else is going on in his head.]
[No, they'll need to start somewhere and with something much smaller to build that confidence back up. So, Jaskier smiles in his understanding and shakes his head a little to brush away that potential apology that might be lingering in Dylan's mind for not attending. He reaches out for the hand rubbing at the edge of his palm.]
I'll walk you to your room.
[It's more a suggestion than it is Jaskier telling Dylan that's exactly what he's going to do. Whether Dylan finds it a ridiculous offer or simply wants to go on his own or whatever it may be, Jaskier's not opposed to letting him go by himself. The point really is more that he doesn't have to if he doesn't want to, and Jaskier doesn't find it absurd that he might want the company for such a short distance.]
[And also that his audience isn't more important right now.]
[ He looks down when Jaskier reaches for his hand and interrupts the self-soothing gesture. To the offer, his expression softens somewhat. Dylan gives over his hand and nods. ]
Sure. Yeah. If you want...
[ If you want, he says...in a way that suggests it's definitely what Dylan wants. Just without the confession that he actually needs someone. Because he needs to be strong here. And he has been. He's been so strong when he's been collecting a series of locks and installing them on his door. When he's been bolting them all shut at night and triple checking they were done before daring to sleep. When he stays in bed the entire day, wondering if the stomach ache he feels is anxiety or the curse and avoids going out to get some food just in case it's the latter. He's been strong because he kept this struggle entirely to himself. Isn't that what brave people do?
And so he heads back to the top of the stairs and leads the way up the relatively small stretch of hall that would take them to his room. Room 209. A sanctuary and a prison. ]
Well. Here it is.
[ And Dylan still doesn't let go of Jaskier even so. ]
[Just as was implied, Jaskier doesn't seem to have many if any thoughts about Dylan wanting Jaskier to stay with him the short walk up the rest of the stairs and to the door to his room. There's not a single comment from Jaskier about it as he follows, keeping a firm but gentle hold on his hand. When they come to a stop in front of Dylan's room, he hums his own acknowledgment to Dylan's, but otherwise allows them to linger there for a bit longer without really saying or doing anything admittedly out of a touch of indecision.]
[He suspects that Dylan would truly like for Jaskier to stay, but that he won't say it. It leads Jaskier to wonder then if Jaskier were to make the offer if Dylan would take him up on it. Some part of him thinks Dylan wouldn't with how much he's been consistently referring to Jaskier needing to be elsewhere right now. At the same time though, maybe it really is just the asking that's the difficult part. Using their joined hands, Jaskier pulls Dylan in closer. His free arm warps itself around Dylan's middle as he rests his chin on his shoulder.]
I'd like to stay.
[There's no unspoken but hanging in the air. It's an offer just like the last and entirely up to Dylan if he wants to take Jaskier up on it or not. Either way, he will come back as he said he would.]
[ The embrace somehow catches him by surprise -- even if it's the expected way they were bound to part ways. A normal thing between them to share an embrace when one is about to leave. Except Jaskier doesn't leave. He suggests the opposite and Dylan's lips part. He hadn't seen anyone since that night except Ronan. And that was still more the same night since Dylan just happened to run into him on the walk back.
His instinct is to come up with a million and one excuses. Jaskier has a performance to get to. People would be disappointed if he didn't show up. And Dylan's room is a mess. But the way Jaskier holds him, there's something solid and supportive about it. He's here to keep Dylan from breaking and pushing Jaskier away would only prolong it. Even if Jaskier went to perform, he was going to come back. So if he's fine with skipping the performance entirely, Dylan will accept. ]
You don't have to...
[ His voice barely a whisper. It's just one last ditch attempt to give him an out. But after a moment, he nods and admits: ]
But I'd like that.
[ His smile is small as he turns in order to fit his key in the door and open it up. And then he turns back toward Jaskier to await his decision -- a decision he's pretty sure he knows what the answer to it will be. ]
[Jaskier's answer is exactly what Dylan predicts it to be. No matter how much Jaskier thrives on an audience and lives for sharing his art with the world, nothing and no one could possibly be more important than the people he loves and cares about. It's arguably not even a choice with how quickly and easily Jaskier makes it, following Dylan into the suite and then into his room.]
[He notices all the locks on the door right away, of course. They are, after all, more or less impossible to miss. But Jaskier doesn't spare them any more than a passing glance and says nothing about them. Dylan likely already knows that those locks wouldn't be able to hold him if he were to transform in his room. And even if they could, the door itself wouldn't likely stand up to a werewolf at his full strength. But it's likely made him feel better, so there's little point in bringing it up and taking that small comfort away from him.]
[Similarly, Jaskier says nothing to the degree to which Dylan's room certainly feels lived in. While it's not exactly what Jaskier would qualify to be messy per se, there's a certain something that's difficult to articulate in its arrangement that speaks to it being occupied more hours of the day than not. Or perhaps that's not true at all, Jaskier thinks to himself briefly. It could be just his assumption is coloring his perception of the room, leading him to assume that's the case when that couldn't be further from the truth. Regardless, Jaskier says nothing about it and settles in with Dylan for several hours.]
[Several hours that are spent talking about nothing particularly important and curled up close with one another. At some point, Jaskier pulls out his lute and, with Dylan in his lap, teaches him a few chords. It's a little bit of a trick as it turns out since Dylan teased before he would be absolutely certain never to cover one of Jaskier's songs, but while playfully drilling Dylan on the chords, Jaskier puts them in the correct order for Toss A Coin and has Dylan play it again and again until it reaches both tempo and recognition. Jaskier allows Dylan the freedom to fiddle around with the lute for a while longer, letting him experiment with the sound until things fall quiet again for a time.]
[Jaskier stays as long as he can with Dylan, but there comes the point where it's time for him to go because there are other promises that need upholding and that means he can't spend the night tonight. But he leaves with a kiss and a gentle reminder to not be such a stranger. Whether it's a simple text or spending time together, Jaskier makes it clear he wants Dylan around. At Dylan's pace as he feels ready for it, of course, but still around. Jaskier lingers for a few minutes longer much as he often does since he's actually quite terrible at even temporary goodbyes. But it allows Dylan to stay in the shelter and safety of his arms for just a little longer before Jaskier really does have to go. With one more kiss to Dylan's cheek and a promise to be there if Dylan needs him for anything, Jaskier takes his leave.]
voice (backdated to july 19th)
Alright, this next one is my latest masterpiece and it's called Dylan Is The Coolest.
[There's a count after that. Which may seem as though Jaskier is committing to the bit that this is a snippet of a live show and to some extent, he is. Except that there is actually a small musical troupe of demons he's actually counting for. Jaskier still thinks they're a bit mediocre for his tastes, but it rounds out the sound and yes, is a way of flaunting what Jaskier can accomplish musically even with only a matter of days to develop it.]
[Despite the title, the verses don't appear to support it at all even if the chorus is the poetic version of No seriously, he's really cool. Trust me! He's really, really cool. The song is largely a playful roast that doesn't point out any genuine flaws or attempts at picking at potential insecurities so much as it fondly teases Dylan for his lame jokes and even more painful pick-up lines and "smooth" attempts at recovery when he's misspoken. The last verse is actually more complimentary in recognition that the listener doesn't appear convinced. Except Jaskier frames it as though he's struggling and grasping at straws to come up with anything to keep in line with the tone of the rest of the song. The music supports this with a few notes being held longer than necessary and unexpected rests as though to reflect Jaskier's drawn-out thinking. But Dylan receives his compliments as there's a small admission that sure, the jokes may be lame, but he's still able to put a smile on someone's face. And, alright, his lines are really bad, but he is quite good-looking. And as for how he is in bed... Jaskier pretends to trail off as if entirely lost in thought, the music similarly fading out for a moment just before he can finish the innuendo as a compliment. And rather than finish it, the chorus comes back to finish the song with more enthusiasm than all its other previous iterations.]
[At the song's end, Jaskier adds just a brief message before ending the voicemail.]
May this year be filled with great joy and laughter, darling. A most happy birthday to you.
text; un: lenivy
So he brushes his teeth and listens...and he's just blown away by what Jaskier has managed to do in such a short space of time. He wrote a full song, and this isn't even something short and sweet. It's a whole production along with what sounds like a group of musicians, all personalized to him. Dylan's been to a couple concerts where the local bands would shout him out on his birthday and play a song in his honor. But that was always something they had written and wasn't personalized in any way. Jaskier has gone above and beyond...and it's honestly the coolest thing anyone has ever done for him.
Dylan laughs along with the jokes. At points, he nearly spits out his mouthful of toothpaste from the punchlines -- but he can't stop grinning ear to ear. When the message ends, he immediately replays it as he goes off to rinse and drop his toothbrush in the holder, humming along to the catchy as fuck chorus before returning to his bed and flopping back on it. With the song's second conclusion, Dylan pulls up Jaskier's name and shoots him off a text. ]
take me now, music man 💖💖💖
i don't think the day could get any better from here.
might as well go back to bed and end on this high point 😍
un: sandpiper
Doesn't exactly give me bragging rights for having perfected the day then, now does it?
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alternative is leave my bedroom and get swept up in a demon orgy
i'm adventurous, dude, but i'm not gonna fuck a demon. pretty sure whatever they got is contagious
like the mermaids 😬😬😬
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But that is completely understandable. It was one thing when they kept it to just a few rooms. It's been a struggle these past few days finding someplace where I can reliably play. 😤😤😤
1/2
are you offering me a piece...............
2/2
that's so thoughtful of you
i mean, there's plenty of room in this bed for you
AND cake 🍰🍰🍰
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You seduced me once, I will give you that, but you're going to have to try a bit harder than that even if it is your birthday. I should be offended that you think I would be so loosely moraled! 😘😘😘
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the greatest and most talented bard i know
if beauty were time, you'd be eternity
would you do me the honor of coming to spend some time with me on my b-day?
is that better? you want more lines?
cuz i got more lines 😚
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I suppose I can spare a few hours of my time as a reward. 😏
So, put away your lines, you scoundrel. You've already managed to charm me once more. Damn your wit and good looks!
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see you in a few
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Ah, look! He arises from bed after all, [he teases, pushing off the doorframe.] I thought perhaps you might decide in the time it took me to get here that sleep may be better given your fondness for it.
[And yet, even as Jaskier teases, he still leans in for a kiss. Chaste and sweet as one hand finds the small of Dylan's back.]
I'm pleased to see you've chosen otherwise.
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I even showered and everything.
[ He shakes his still-damp hair like a dog. Fortunately, it's dried enough to not send droplets spraying at Jaskier. A smile stretches across his face following the kiss and his arms casually drape around Jaskier's shoulders, wrists hanging limply. In all honesty, Dylan didn't expect such casual affection. Not that he expected Jaskier to remain at a distance because they were always going to be friends, but he had managed to convince himself what happened that night was probably a one night stand.
It's nice to know Jaskier's affection lasts longer than a single evening. ]
Lucky you. You're worth the effort.
[ And then Dylan straight up ducks his head so Jaskier can get a whiff of his strands. ]
You like it, though? I got my hands on some eucalyptus and peppermint shampoo. My scalp still has the happy tingles.
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Now, however will you possibly best these lengths you've gone to in the future? [he teases.] You start slacking and I'm going to have no choice, but to assume the worst. Then I shall be terribly heartbroken. After all, how am I supposed to cope with losing the affection of The Coolest, hm?
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[ Dylan smiles, vibrant and carefree. His hands slip away from Jaskier's shoulders to fall on his chest and drum a brief alternating pattern against it. ]
Good news for you is people and all beings are just balls of infinite possibilities. You never know how I'll surprise you next~
[ He leans in, brushing a kiss to Jaskier's lips before he saunters away toward his unmade nest of a bed -- the covers practically an invitation to return to them. He pats the space beside him. ]
I still can't believe you actually did the song. I mean, I believe you were capable. It's just....I didn't think you'd actually do it.
[ The smile on Dylan's face is still bright, but this time there's something genuinely touched about it -- about the effort Jaskier went to in order to make this day special. Not knowing anyone here, it's not like he could have a big birthday bash. He figured it would pass quietly -- maybe he would mention it at the kitchen to get a cupcake made for him or something. But Jaskier made it memorable. Perhaps one of his most memorable gifts. It's just...
It's nice. ]
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[Once Dylan is settled, Jaskier takes up the space offered to him, nestling in close to him.]
You're not the first to say as much to me. And I can't exactly say I fault you for assuming I wouldn't. I am world-renowned where I'm from and so, it's assumed I would only sing of greatness, be it people or deeds. [After all, taking a monster who hunts monsters and making him now into one of the greatest heroes of the Continent? It's ambitious to say the very least. It would be easy to assume Jaskier would be bored by more mundane matters except there's one flaw with that assumption.] But how quickly everyone forgets that while true I sing of greatness, I find greatness everywhere in the world around me.
[Nothing is truly mundane when one always looks at the world with wonder in their eyes.]
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That's because you look for it. Not everyone's gonna see what you see, even after hearing your music. But some will. And it's nice you can share that greatness with others.
[ He shifts across Jaskier for a moment, reaching into a drawer where he pulls out a couple of bottles of nail polish. Clearly, he had been poking around the mansion and might have swiped these from one of the makeover counters. But he figures they won't miss them. The colors range from black to pastel purples, blues and pinks. Dylan takes a moment to bring each bottle up to Jaskier's outfit, trying to find the best fit and ultimately settles on the pink. He takes that one and the black and then gives each bottle a good shake. ]
Do you find it limiting being stuck here with roughly about a hundred people? I mean, back home you had a whole world of people to sing about and adore. Here, it's like...well, probably more people went to one of your shows back home than are here for redemption.
[ It might seem almost claustrophobic compared to what Jaskier is used to. But Dylan is genuinely curious about Jaskier's opinion. And although Dylan currently has both bottles open and is working on applying them in an alternating pattern on his nails (black, pink, black, pink, black) -- he's fully listening to what Jaskier's saying. It's just hard for Dylan to ever sit still terribly long. ]
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Well, considering the extent of my catalog that's about one man alone, I should hope I don't find it limiting, [he says, answering Dylan's question while watching him apply the varnish to his nails. Despite his own curiosity about what it is Dylan's doing, Jaskier still doesn't provide him with a shallow answer. As with anything to do with his art, Jaskier is perpetually thoughtful on the matter.] But your assertion also isn't true. I rarely play to a crowd so large save the times I've been invited to court or festivals or some other such celebration, and while it is undeniably good coin and I would never turn down the opportunity, they are not to my preference. I play in taverns all over the Continent, some of which are in towns so small, most could not tell you even which kingdom they belong and all I manage to earn is a roof over my head for the night and food in my belly.
[Jaskier, it would seem, is that hypothetical indie artist who managed to enter the mainstream without losing the intimacy of his shows and is able to maintain those smaller venues without some exorbitant charge attached to it.]
Some consider my work to be banal. Pandering, I believe, is a word that's been used. But those are the words of men who would claim someplace as theirs and yet deem the populace unworthy or incapable of understanding their music. [He wrinkles his nose at that, as though his opinion on the matter weren't obvious.] Why should the farmer not be able to experience all joy and beauty in this world as much as his lord? I've never found a satisfactory answer to that. So, let my music be banal and pandering if that's the case! I'd rather that than find myself trapped, playing the same five or so songs to a lord that hardly pays them any mind until by his grace I ought to find myself welcome to play a few melodies from his childhood that reminds him of glorious days when he was not fat or grey.
[Jaskier sighs a little then, not quite sad but certainly with a sense of longing.]
But I suppose that is what I miss about home relative to here. Aside from the winter months, I had the whole of the Continent to travel as much and as far as I pleased. Difficult as it was at times—and especially so recently with the constant ravaging and threat of war—I've always been most happy out there in the world. But here, I find myself... [Jaskier trails off a moment as he tries to find the right word.] Caged. There's so very little that can even be traveled that I believe this is the most still I've been since I was a boy and it was only my academics that ever allowed me to travel beyond my family's land.
[It leaves his wanderlust unsated and stirs a sense of restlessness within him whenever he allows himself to think on it.]
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Dylan goes back to his nails to finish off the first hand, curling them near his lips when he's done to gently blow on them. ]
I guess that's the good thing these days. Music can be recorded and reach everyone. It doesn't have to come from one kind bard willing to cater to a wide ranging audience. You lose the authenticity of a live performance with recordings but you gain the ability to listen whenever and wherever you want.
[ He pushes the bottles of polish toward Jaskier and holds out his unpainted hand -- the hint being that he'd like Jaskier to do the task for him while the other hand dries. But Jaskier likely knows Dylan enough by now to know it wouldn't bother him if Jaskier would rather not. ]
But yeah. I'd bet you're getting pretty stir-crazy here. From what people said, you guys were basically stuck in that hotel for a long time until God destroyed it, right? You at least liking this change of scenery? The whole mansion vibe?
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I'm afraid it doesn't feel all like that much of a change to me. It's larger and a bit nicer and the staff is more accommodating. So if I had my choice between the hotel or here, I would choose here, but a gilded cage is still a cage. [He doesn't speak of it with any sort of doom and gloom in his voice, just more a statement of fact. They are just as confined in this mansion as they were back in the hotel, and so the change in scenery hardly feels like much of a change at all to him.] Ah, but you don't need my complaints today. While I imagine there are probably other ways you'd prefer to celebrate your birthday, this mansion is certainly an upgrade from the alternative. Your own private room, a waitstaff ready and willing to wait on you hand and foot...
[He grins at Dylan.]
I hope you've made at least one absurd request of the staff.
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[ He smiles, watching Jaskier apply the coats of nail polish with careful ease. Really, what can't his nimble fingers do? ]
It helps that there are some real hotties here. And the hottest of hotties happens to be in my bed. What request could I make of the waitstaff that's better than that?
[ Dylan winks. He hasn't harassed the waitstaff, although Jaskier's suggestion certainly gives him ideas. ]
Oh. Would it be completely terrible of me to request like a massive, three-tiered cake? With piped flowers and rainbow colored icing? Funfetti, of course. Because that's the queer of cakes. Oh my god, you probably haven't had funfetti yet, I'm realizing! Now I gotta do this to share a slice of the modern world with you. It's sickeningly sweet and you'll probably hate it, but consider it a welcome to American Culture -- land of excessive sugar and unhealthy habits.
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And how do you know I would hate it? [Jaskier raises his chin a little at Dylan with a grin.] Don't you pride yourself on being "sickeningly sweet?" I didn't exactly hesitate in having a taste of you, now did I?
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[ A memory that certainly brings a tingle to his skin in all the right places. As the final coat of nail polish is applied, he brings his fingers back to gently blow across them. ]
And it was definitely an event.
[ Dylan hardly remembers much about that boat ride beyond what happened beneath that blanket. He scoots in to tuck himself against Jaskier's side, using his shoulders to nudge Jaskier's arm around him while he keeps his hands away just long enough for nails to continue drying. ]
Careful, though. I'm gonna fall for you before you know it and then what are you gonna do? You won't be able to get rid of me, much to your detriment. And then if Ryan ever happens to wind up in hell, he'd be so jealous.
[ There's a smile on his lips when he says it. A smile that says he's not at all serious. Because for one, Ryan wouldn't care more than likely. And two, Dylan also doesn't think Jaskier would care if he did fall for him.
Which....he kinda already has, so too late on that end. ]
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You're going to fall for me? I gave you a wonderful night, a song, and all my best charm, and you still haven't fallen for me? [Jaskier scoffs a little with his mock-offense, shaking his head.] Either you are the most fickle person I've ever met or you're full of absolute shit.
[His hand comes away from his own chest and he waves it dismissively.]
Regardless, I'm generous enough that I'm more than willing to make him the most envious man in all of Hell at the very least. Perhaps across all the possible worlds if you're kind to me.
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All those things were wonderful, but you haven't even taken me on a proper date. How am I supposed to fall for you without a date? We're doing all of this backwards. So when we get back to Penance and there are a multitude of burned out buildings to go, I expect a proper date, Jaskier. And only then will I fall for you.
[ He teases, turning his head to press a kiss to his lips. ]
For now, though...I don't mind getting kinda improper for my birthday.
[ Dylan winks. ]
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Improper, hm? [He withdraws his arm from around Dylan's shoulders to instead straddle Dylan. As he speaks, Jaskier's hands wander along his torso over the top of his t-shirt.] Well. Normally, I would say absolutely not at the suggestion. After all, you apparently haven't fallen in love with me despite my best efforts. What sort of person would I be to fall into bed with such a cad? My reputation is already in shambles as it is after that grand seduction on the boat.
[Jaskier leans forward to kiss Dylan, the kiss lingering and slow. Jaskier deepens the kiss as his hands find the hem of his shirt, lifting it to slip beneath and find warm skin. He traces little patterns along Dylan's lower stomach. He breaks off the kiss, but doesn't wander very far.]
But since it's your birthday, [he says with a pleased sigh,] I think we can make an exception...
backdated to a couple of days after the full moon
[Jaskier jogs the short distance to the bottom of the stairs leading up to the rooms upon spotting him, but stops there rather than following Dylan up further.]
[He made the decision to give Dylan a bit of space after... Well. Everything. The other night. It seemed the right thing to do in giving Dylan the breathing room to recover and figure out how he wanted to talk about it further, assuming that he wanted to talk about it at all. But as the day began stretching itself into two... There was taking space and then there was silence, and it was beginning to feel increasingly like the latter. Jaskier would have thought after at least a day there would be something from Dylan. Even if it wasn't talking about the whole werewolf thing, at least a silly little text or something. Not this complete and utter silence as though Dylan had never been.]
I was beginning to think you managed to make it back home. [It's not as direct a call out as it possibly could be, but Jaskier doesn't particularly feel inclined to rub Dylan's nose in it so much as let him know that he knows when he's being avoided. He also isn't looking to ambush the poor man either, offering Dylan a bit of choice in the matter as he asks,] Do you have a few minutes? Or shall I try to find you after my set?
[He hadn't come here looking for Dylan specifically, after all. Most of the time if Jaskier's at the hotel, it's to see Geralt or Yennefer or someone else who still resides here. Otherwise, it's purely for the opportunity to play to a crowd.]
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Dylan closes his eyes and lets out a breath, turning to face Jaskier -- one hand anxiously rubbing his opposite arm just beneath the tattoo. ]
Oh. No. Still here.
[ His brows furrow and his eyes drop to his sneakers. ]
I'm actually, um...
[ He grapples to come up with some excuse. It's not that he doesn't want to see Jaskier. It's more that he doesn't want to face his shame. His shame in what he is. His shame for not saying something sooner. His shame for worrying Jaskier, not just over him but over Geralt and Laura as well.
Unfortunately, he fails to come up with something timely enough. Dylan finally looks up to meet Jaskier's gaze. ]
You shouldn't be late for your set, man. Go and dazzle your captive audience.
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I'll look for you after then. [Leaning up slightly, he presses a kiss to Dylan's cheek.] Text me if you're not going to be in your room, yeah?
[Jaskier smiles at him then, giving his hand a light squeeze before he turns and makes his way back down the stairs. He holds Dylan's hand until the physical distance caused by his descent makes their fingertips slip from one another. The sudden, unprompted affection may appear somewhat of an ambush of its own. Perhaps it is. Jaskier wouldn't exactly have much of an argument to provide for why it's not, after all. But Jaskier would prefer it be considered an ambush of its own than allowing Dylan to stew on whatever he imagines Jaskier might say or do later. Or, well... Jaskier imagines Dylan is liable to still stew. But hopefully, a touch to the hand and a kiss to his cheek could provide him with a little relief. Maybe Dylan can be simply nervous rather than dreading what was to come or fearing the worst.]
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Look. You don't have to keep hanging around me out of pity or something. Like some gangly stray mutt you keep feeding. Only turns out that gangly mutt is pretty fucking feral and will definitely bite the hand that feeds it. And why stop at the hand when it can go for the throat, too?
[ He gets a bit queasy thinking about it and grasps the banister to steady himself. ]
I'm a monster, Jaskier. And maybe I killed some things, too. I don't know. There were a whole lot of parts and blood around that clearing when I came to in the morning.
[ And Dylan wasn't exactly keen to ask Geralt for the deets, mostly because part of him didn't want to know what happened. Ignorance in this case was bliss. But ignorance also ate at his conscience for the past couple days and haunted his dreams at night. He sighs. ]
Who wants to be around something like that?
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Well. Let's get one thing straight, shall we? You, good sir, are not a monster. [Jaskier holds up a hand.] Before you go accusing me of deluding myself, I know. I know. [His hand drops back down to his side.] It's arguable that for twelve perhaps even thirteen nights out of the year, you might very well be considered a monster. But a monster wouldn't have called me that night, Dylan. [Jaskier starts walking up the steps to rejoin Dylan again.] A monster wouldn't have been trying to put as much distance between himself and everyone in this hotel.
[This time, Jaskier stops on the same step as Dylan, but rather than taking his hand, Jaskier caresses his cheek to encourage Dylan to look at Jaskier rather than averting his eyes.]
A monster wouldn't blanch at the thought of hurting me or anyone else.
There may now be one night a month that I don't particularly wish to be in the same room as you. And I do wish you didn't have to go through all of this because it isn't fair that you should. But nothing else has changed. [Jaskier takes his hand from Dylan's cheek to clap him on the shoulder, giving it a light squeeze.] So, whatever little arguments you've managed to construct over the past few days, let me go ahead and tell you, there isn't any point in saying them to me.
Because you, my dear cad, made me fall in love with you. That means unless you intend to tell me to fuck off, I'm not going anywhere. And even then, I'm not sure you'll have much luck with that. [Jaskier looks away from Dylan for a moment as his expression shifts to one of mild disgust.] I mean, if Jazzybear hasn't managed to scare me off, I don't know what possibly could.
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He's not sure where he falls on the topic. Yeah, he'd like to believe he was only a monster one night out of the month, but the truth is -- it's always a part of him. When he can't go swimming or take a bath because he's afraid to be submerged in water. When he touches anything silver and gets burned. When he gets hurt and heals immediately. The curse is always there. It doesn't only make itself known one night of the month. But it does mean a lot that Jaskier can look at him and not see a monster.
A breath escapes him and he glances to the side only for that gaze to immediately snap back toward Jaskier as he just -- did he just...was that--? Did he say he fell in love with Dylan? Was it a joke? Dylan always joked about making Jaskier love him, so maybe it was a joke to make him feel better? Or maybe.....
No. It couldn't be, right? ]
Uh, excuse you. Jazzybear is cute and the only thing you should be doing is thanking me for that adorable nickname.
[ A smile faintly touches his lips before he takes a step forward to slide his arms beneath Jaskier's, elbows bending so his fingers can rest on Jaskier's shoulders from behind. It's not an embrace of affection -- arms wrapped around one another. It's an embrace of caution and fear and tentativeness. It's an embrace Jaskier could easily escape if he's really not comfortable. But it's also one that tips his hand -- that shows how afraid Dylan is and even a request for protection. Even if there's not much Jaskier can do, maybe he can still keep Dylan from losing himself. ]
Sorry. I'm keeping you, aren't I?
[ But even as he says it, he doesn't make a move to let go of Jaskier, chin settling on his shoulder. ]
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They can wait.
[Much like Dylan, there isn't really any attempt to let him go. He isn't trying to rush Dylan through the embrace, but rather allowing him to take shelter there as long as he needs it. And he needs it. Jaskier knows without question our doubt that Dylan really needs it. The look of barely contained tears in his eyes when Jaskier refused to accept the notion that he ought to keep his distance spoke to Dylan's fears and the pain of all this. If Jaskier could take it away with this embrace, he would. But Jaskier knows he doesn't have any ability to help with this. Still, he talks to Dylan about possibilities, trying to bolster a little more hope within him about his future and that this curse doesn't need to define him or his life.]
I'm not sure how much can ultimately be done to end your curse since it's a bit different from the cases of lycanthropy back home, but Geralt says that every curse has a condition for breaking them. So, don't you start giving up on yourself to this curse just yet. We can talk more with Geralt about it sometime. Or Yennefer, if you like. She's a... Ah, well, she's incredibly terrifying. I cannot emphasize that enough. But she's a very powerful and skilled sorceress. Even if she can't figure out a cure, she could perhaps make like a proper witch and find a potion that might weaken you or something on the nights you're going to transform and make you less of a danger.
But regardless, no matter what happens from today forward, no more talk of abandoning you, yeah? I'm not going anywhere.
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I need you to make me a promise then, Jaskier.
[ Slowly, reluctantly, Dylan inches back so he can meet Jaskier's gaze. His expression is uncharacteristically somber because this is the thing Dylan fears the most. This is the thing that will make him a monster more than the transformation itself. He pulls in a shaky breath. ]
You can't let me hurt anyone. Whether that's finding a place for me to chain myself up or calling Geralt up to stand guard or even one of Yennefer's potions. If I wake up and find a mangled body that I was responsible for...I don't think I could take it.
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[And yet, even knowing that reality, Jaskier doesn't want to crush Dylan's tenuous hope either. Jaskier doesn't know what better choice in this situation is and although he doesn't act upon it, Jaskier feels the impulse to hold onto Dylan tighter as he's weighing it out. But then again, perhaps because of that impulse, he knows what the better choice is after all. A pretty lie may feel better in the moment, but what happens if what Jaskier fears could happen comes to pass? What if this place leaves them in a situation where Dylan loses control without warning and there isn't enough time to put up any sort of barrier between himself and others? The lie won't have meant anything then. If anything, it can only make that worse.]
I'll do everything that I can, Dylan. I promise. As long as I can help it, I won't let you hurt anyone.
[It's not the exact promise that Dylan was necessarily asking him to make, but it's the most honest version of it. If they can figure something else besides running blindly into the woods for the upcoming cycle, then that will be a good first step. They can start to figure something out beyond that for when Hell does inevitably say fuck it to whatever carefully laid plans they have.]
We'll do whatever it takes.
[Including Geralt taking on the grim task of putting Dylan down if that's what ends up being needed. But Dylan already knows that or he wouldn't have called the other night and asked for Jaskier to send him.]
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Thank you.
[ He steps in and plants a kiss on the side of Jaskier's cheek. A moment of affection, plain and simple. It's chaste and light and delicate as thin glass. Dylan seems only a hair's breadth away from shattering like said glass as well. He steps into his own space again, opposite fingers rubbing at the edge of his palm where the bite had originally happened. ]
Anyway, I kept you long enough. There are more important people than me. Go on and be your sexy rocker self. I'll be in my room if you still plan on stopping by later. I'd come to your show, but.
[ He swallows, eyes flicking toward the top of the stairs. ]
I don't like.... Being out. For long. Since that night.
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[No, they'll need to start somewhere and with something much smaller to build that confidence back up. So, Jaskier smiles in his understanding and shakes his head a little to brush away that potential apology that might be lingering in Dylan's mind for not attending. He reaches out for the hand rubbing at the edge of his palm.]
I'll walk you to your room.
[It's more a suggestion than it is Jaskier telling Dylan that's exactly what he's going to do. Whether Dylan finds it a ridiculous offer or simply wants to go on his own or whatever it may be, Jaskier's not opposed to letting him go by himself. The point really is more that he doesn't have to if he doesn't want to, and Jaskier doesn't find it absurd that he might want the company for such a short distance.]
[And also that his audience isn't more important right now.]
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Sure. Yeah. If you want...
[ If you want, he says...in a way that suggests it's definitely what Dylan wants. Just without the confession that he actually needs someone. Because he needs to be strong here. And he has been. He's been so strong when he's been collecting a series of locks and installing them on his door. When he's been bolting them all shut at night and triple checking they were done before daring to sleep. When he stays in bed the entire day, wondering if the stomach ache he feels is anxiety or the curse and avoids going out to get some food just in case it's the latter. He's been strong because he kept this struggle entirely to himself. Isn't that what brave people do?
And so he heads back to the top of the stairs and leads the way up the relatively small stretch of hall that would take them to his room. Room 209. A sanctuary and a prison. ]
Well. Here it is.
[ And Dylan still doesn't let go of Jaskier even so. ]
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[He suspects that Dylan would truly like for Jaskier to stay, but that he won't say it. It leads Jaskier to wonder then if Jaskier were to make the offer if Dylan would take him up on it. Some part of him thinks Dylan wouldn't with how much he's been consistently referring to Jaskier needing to be elsewhere right now. At the same time though, maybe it really is just the asking that's the difficult part. Using their joined hands, Jaskier pulls Dylan in closer. His free arm warps itself around Dylan's middle as he rests his chin on his shoulder.]
I'd like to stay.
[There's no unspoken but hanging in the air. It's an offer just like the last and entirely up to Dylan if he wants to take Jaskier up on it or not. Either way, he will come back as he said he would.]
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His instinct is to come up with a million and one excuses. Jaskier has a performance to get to. People would be disappointed if he didn't show up. And Dylan's room is a mess. But the way Jaskier holds him, there's something solid and supportive about it. He's here to keep Dylan from breaking and pushing Jaskier away would only prolong it. Even if Jaskier went to perform, he was going to come back. So if he's fine with skipping the performance entirely, Dylan will accept. ]
You don't have to...
[ His voice barely a whisper. It's just one last ditch attempt to give him an out. But after a moment, he nods and admits: ]
But I'd like that.
[ His smile is small as he turns in order to fit his key in the door and open it up. And then he turns back toward Jaskier to await his decision -- a decision he's pretty sure he knows what the answer to it will be. ]
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[He notices all the locks on the door right away, of course. They are, after all, more or less impossible to miss. But Jaskier doesn't spare them any more than a passing glance and says nothing about them. Dylan likely already knows that those locks wouldn't be able to hold him if he were to transform in his room. And even if they could, the door itself wouldn't likely stand up to a werewolf at his full strength. But it's likely made him feel better, so there's little point in bringing it up and taking that small comfort away from him.]
[Similarly, Jaskier says nothing to the degree to which Dylan's room certainly feels lived in. While it's not exactly what Jaskier would qualify to be messy per se, there's a certain something that's difficult to articulate in its arrangement that speaks to it being occupied more hours of the day than not. Or perhaps that's not true at all, Jaskier thinks to himself briefly. It could be just his assumption is coloring his perception of the room, leading him to assume that's the case when that couldn't be further from the truth. Regardless, Jaskier says nothing about it and settles in with Dylan for several hours.]
[Several hours that are spent talking about nothing particularly important and curled up close with one another. At some point, Jaskier pulls out his lute and, with Dylan in his lap, teaches him a few chords. It's a little bit of a trick as it turns out since Dylan teased before he would be absolutely certain never to cover one of Jaskier's songs, but while playfully drilling Dylan on the chords, Jaskier puts them in the correct order for Toss A Coin and has Dylan play it again and again until it reaches both tempo and recognition. Jaskier allows Dylan the freedom to fiddle around with the lute for a while longer, letting him experiment with the sound until things fall quiet again for a time.]
[Jaskier stays as long as he can with Dylan, but there comes the point where it's time for him to go because there are other promises that need upholding and that means he can't spend the night tonight. But he leaves with a kiss and a gentle reminder to not be such a stranger. Whether it's a simple text or spending time together, Jaskier makes it clear he wants Dylan around. At Dylan's pace as he feels ready for it, of course, but still around. Jaskier lingers for a few minutes longer much as he often does since he's actually quite terrible at even temporary goodbyes. But it allows Dylan to stay in the shelter and safety of his arms for just a little longer before Jaskier really does have to go. With one more kiss to Dylan's cheek and a promise to be there if Dylan needs him for anything, Jaskier takes his leave.]