[Jaskier purses his lips a little at the requested promise. It's not that he doesn't want to make the promise. Even without Dylan emphasizing it to be as important as he is now, Jaskier knows how important it is. Were their positions reversed, Jaskier would probably plead with Dylan to make the same promise. But the trouble is perhaps less with the promise itself and more where they are. If there is one thing that Jaskier's learned in his time here, it's that Hell does eventually take matters into its own hands. Whatever it is you might be trying to avoid or run from, it will find a way to dig it out. There is simply no reason to think this might be an exception.]
[And yet, even knowing that reality, Jaskier doesn't want to crush Dylan's tenuous hope either. Jaskier doesn't know what better choice in this situation is and although he doesn't act upon it, Jaskier feels the impulse to hold onto Dylan tighter as he's weighing it out. But then again, perhaps because of that impulse, he knows what the better choice is after all. A pretty lie may feel better in the moment, but what happens if what Jaskier fears could happen comes to pass? What if this place leaves them in a situation where Dylan loses control without warning and there isn't enough time to put up any sort of barrier between himself and others? The lie won't have meant anything then. If anything, it can only make that worse.]
I'll do everything that I can, Dylan. I promise. As long as I can help it, I won't let you hurt anyone.
[It's not the exact promise that Dylan was necessarily asking him to make, but it's the most honest version of it. If they can figure something else besides running blindly into the woods for the upcoming cycle, then that will be a good first step. They can start to figure something out beyond that for when Hell does inevitably say fuck it to whatever carefully laid plans they have.]
We'll do whatever it takes.
[Including Geralt taking on the grim task of putting Dylan down if that's what ends up being needed. But Dylan already knows that or he wouldn't have called the other night and asked for Jaskier to send him.]
[ It's not the promise Dylan wants, no. But even he recognizes the impossibility of what he's asking Jaskier. And while Dylan would hardly place any of the blame on Jaskier if there turned out to be little he could do, he can understand why Jaskier would not want to commit to a promise he can only try his best to uphold in a place that tends to make sure everyone gets their fair share of suffering. He offers a smile, faint and appreciative. Even this much means a lot. Jaskier owes him nothing, and yet he's done nothing but try to be there ever since Dylan called him that night. ]
Thank you.
[ He steps in and plants a kiss on the side of Jaskier's cheek. A moment of affection, plain and simple. It's chaste and light and delicate as thin glass. Dylan seems only a hair's breadth away from shattering like said glass as well. He steps into his own space again, opposite fingers rubbing at the edge of his palm where the bite had originally happened. ]
Anyway, I kept you long enough. There are more important people than me. Go on and be your sexy rocker self. I'll be in my room if you still plan on stopping by later. I'd come to your show, but.
[ He swallows, eyes flicking toward the top of the stairs. ]
I don't like.... Being out. For long. Since that night.
[There is, of course, a part of Jaskier that wants to push Dylan. It's not like him to be so withdrawn and reclusive, and it would do him good to start reclaiming what was more his norm. And Jaskier would like to think he perhaps felt safe enough around Jaskier that even if he was in a small crowd, it wouldn't be so terrible. That perhaps he could just lose himself in the music and not think about all of that for a little while. But Jaskier also recognizes that may simply be too much too soon right now. In fact, it most likely is and regardless of how safe he might feel with Jaskier, that's not going to be enough to counteract whatever else is going on in his head.]
[No, they'll need to start somewhere and with something much smaller to build that confidence back up. So, Jaskier smiles in his understanding and shakes his head a little to brush away that potential apology that might be lingering in Dylan's mind for not attending. He reaches out for the hand rubbing at the edge of his palm.]
I'll walk you to your room.
[It's more a suggestion than it is Jaskier telling Dylan that's exactly what he's going to do. Whether Dylan finds it a ridiculous offer or simply wants to go on his own or whatever it may be, Jaskier's not opposed to letting him go by himself. The point really is more that he doesn't have to if he doesn't want to, and Jaskier doesn't find it absurd that he might want the company for such a short distance.]
[And also that his audience isn't more important right now.]
[ He looks down when Jaskier reaches for his hand and interrupts the self-soothing gesture. To the offer, his expression softens somewhat. Dylan gives over his hand and nods. ]
Sure. Yeah. If you want...
[ If you want, he says...in a way that suggests it's definitely what Dylan wants. Just without the confession that he actually needs someone. Because he needs to be strong here. And he has been. He's been so strong when he's been collecting a series of locks and installing them on his door. When he's been bolting them all shut at night and triple checking they were done before daring to sleep. When he stays in bed the entire day, wondering if the stomach ache he feels is anxiety or the curse and avoids going out to get some food just in case it's the latter. He's been strong because he kept this struggle entirely to himself. Isn't that what brave people do?
And so he heads back to the top of the stairs and leads the way up the relatively small stretch of hall that would take them to his room. Room 209. A sanctuary and a prison. ]
Well. Here it is.
[ And Dylan still doesn't let go of Jaskier even so. ]
[Just as was implied, Jaskier doesn't seem to have many if any thoughts about Dylan wanting Jaskier to stay with him the short walk up the rest of the stairs and to the door to his room. There's not a single comment from Jaskier about it as he follows, keeping a firm but gentle hold on his hand. When they come to a stop in front of Dylan's room, he hums his own acknowledgment to Dylan's, but otherwise allows them to linger there for a bit longer without really saying or doing anything admittedly out of a touch of indecision.]
[He suspects that Dylan would truly like for Jaskier to stay, but that he won't say it. It leads Jaskier to wonder then if Jaskier were to make the offer if Dylan would take him up on it. Some part of him thinks Dylan wouldn't with how much he's been consistently referring to Jaskier needing to be elsewhere right now. At the same time though, maybe it really is just the asking that's the difficult part. Using their joined hands, Jaskier pulls Dylan in closer. His free arm warps itself around Dylan's middle as he rests his chin on his shoulder.]
I'd like to stay.
[There's no unspoken but hanging in the air. It's an offer just like the last and entirely up to Dylan if he wants to take Jaskier up on it or not. Either way, he will come back as he said he would.]
[ The embrace somehow catches him by surprise -- even if it's the expected way they were bound to part ways. A normal thing between them to share an embrace when one is about to leave. Except Jaskier doesn't leave. He suggests the opposite and Dylan's lips part. He hadn't seen anyone since that night except Ronan. And that was still more the same night since Dylan just happened to run into him on the walk back.
His instinct is to come up with a million and one excuses. Jaskier has a performance to get to. People would be disappointed if he didn't show up. And Dylan's room is a mess. But the way Jaskier holds him, there's something solid and supportive about it. He's here to keep Dylan from breaking and pushing Jaskier away would only prolong it. Even if Jaskier went to perform, he was going to come back. So if he's fine with skipping the performance entirely, Dylan will accept. ]
You don't have to...
[ His voice barely a whisper. It's just one last ditch attempt to give him an out. But after a moment, he nods and admits: ]
But I'd like that.
[ His smile is small as he turns in order to fit his key in the door and open it up. And then he turns back toward Jaskier to await his decision -- a decision he's pretty sure he knows what the answer to it will be. ]
[Jaskier's answer is exactly what Dylan predicts it to be. No matter how much Jaskier thrives on an audience and lives for sharing his art with the world, nothing and no one could possibly be more important than the people he loves and cares about. It's arguably not even a choice with how quickly and easily Jaskier makes it, following Dylan into the suite and then into his room.]
[He notices all the locks on the door right away, of course. They are, after all, more or less impossible to miss. But Jaskier doesn't spare them any more than a passing glance and says nothing about them. Dylan likely already knows that those locks wouldn't be able to hold him if he were to transform in his room. And even if they could, the door itself wouldn't likely stand up to a werewolf at his full strength. But it's likely made him feel better, so there's little point in bringing it up and taking that small comfort away from him.]
[Similarly, Jaskier says nothing to the degree to which Dylan's room certainly feels lived in. While it's not exactly what Jaskier would qualify to be messy per se, there's a certain something that's difficult to articulate in its arrangement that speaks to it being occupied more hours of the day than not. Or perhaps that's not true at all, Jaskier thinks to himself briefly. It could be just his assumption is coloring his perception of the room, leading him to assume that's the case when that couldn't be further from the truth. Regardless, Jaskier says nothing about it and settles in with Dylan for several hours.]
[Several hours that are spent talking about nothing particularly important and curled up close with one another. At some point, Jaskier pulls out his lute and, with Dylan in his lap, teaches him a few chords. It's a little bit of a trick as it turns out since Dylan teased before he would be absolutely certain never to cover one of Jaskier's songs, but while playfully drilling Dylan on the chords, Jaskier puts them in the correct order for Toss A Coin and has Dylan play it again and again until it reaches both tempo and recognition. Jaskier allows Dylan the freedom to fiddle around with the lute for a while longer, letting him experiment with the sound until things fall quiet again for a time.]
[Jaskier stays as long as he can with Dylan, but there comes the point where it's time for him to go because there are other promises that need upholding and that means he can't spend the night tonight. But he leaves with a kiss and a gentle reminder to not be such a stranger. Whether it's a simple text or spending time together, Jaskier makes it clear he wants Dylan around. At Dylan's pace as he feels ready for it, of course, but still around. Jaskier lingers for a few minutes longer much as he often does since he's actually quite terrible at even temporary goodbyes. But it allows Dylan to stay in the shelter and safety of his arms for just a little longer before Jaskier really does have to go. With one more kiss to Dylan's cheek and a promise to be there if Dylan needs him for anything, Jaskier takes his leave.]
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no subject
[And yet, even knowing that reality, Jaskier doesn't want to crush Dylan's tenuous hope either. Jaskier doesn't know what better choice in this situation is and although he doesn't act upon it, Jaskier feels the impulse to hold onto Dylan tighter as he's weighing it out. But then again, perhaps because of that impulse, he knows what the better choice is after all. A pretty lie may feel better in the moment, but what happens if what Jaskier fears could happen comes to pass? What if this place leaves them in a situation where Dylan loses control without warning and there isn't enough time to put up any sort of barrier between himself and others? The lie won't have meant anything then. If anything, it can only make that worse.]
I'll do everything that I can, Dylan. I promise. As long as I can help it, I won't let you hurt anyone.
[It's not the exact promise that Dylan was necessarily asking him to make, but it's the most honest version of it. If they can figure something else besides running blindly into the woods for the upcoming cycle, then that will be a good first step. They can start to figure something out beyond that for when Hell does inevitably say fuck it to whatever carefully laid plans they have.]
We'll do whatever it takes.
[Including Geralt taking on the grim task of putting Dylan down if that's what ends up being needed. But Dylan already knows that or he wouldn't have called the other night and asked for Jaskier to send him.]
no subject
Thank you.
[ He steps in and plants a kiss on the side of Jaskier's cheek. A moment of affection, plain and simple. It's chaste and light and delicate as thin glass. Dylan seems only a hair's breadth away from shattering like said glass as well. He steps into his own space again, opposite fingers rubbing at the edge of his palm where the bite had originally happened. ]
Anyway, I kept you long enough. There are more important people than me. Go on and be your sexy rocker self. I'll be in my room if you still plan on stopping by later. I'd come to your show, but.
[ He swallows, eyes flicking toward the top of the stairs. ]
I don't like.... Being out. For long. Since that night.
no subject
[No, they'll need to start somewhere and with something much smaller to build that confidence back up. So, Jaskier smiles in his understanding and shakes his head a little to brush away that potential apology that might be lingering in Dylan's mind for not attending. He reaches out for the hand rubbing at the edge of his palm.]
I'll walk you to your room.
[It's more a suggestion than it is Jaskier telling Dylan that's exactly what he's going to do. Whether Dylan finds it a ridiculous offer or simply wants to go on his own or whatever it may be, Jaskier's not opposed to letting him go by himself. The point really is more that he doesn't have to if he doesn't want to, and Jaskier doesn't find it absurd that he might want the company for such a short distance.]
[And also that his audience isn't more important right now.]
no subject
Sure. Yeah. If you want...
[ If you want, he says...in a way that suggests it's definitely what Dylan wants. Just without the confession that he actually needs someone. Because he needs to be strong here. And he has been. He's been so strong when he's been collecting a series of locks and installing them on his door. When he's been bolting them all shut at night and triple checking they were done before daring to sleep. When he stays in bed the entire day, wondering if the stomach ache he feels is anxiety or the curse and avoids going out to get some food just in case it's the latter. He's been strong because he kept this struggle entirely to himself. Isn't that what brave people do?
And so he heads back to the top of the stairs and leads the way up the relatively small stretch of hall that would take them to his room. Room 209. A sanctuary and a prison. ]
Well. Here it is.
[ And Dylan still doesn't let go of Jaskier even so. ]
no subject
[He suspects that Dylan would truly like for Jaskier to stay, but that he won't say it. It leads Jaskier to wonder then if Jaskier were to make the offer if Dylan would take him up on it. Some part of him thinks Dylan wouldn't with how much he's been consistently referring to Jaskier needing to be elsewhere right now. At the same time though, maybe it really is just the asking that's the difficult part. Using their joined hands, Jaskier pulls Dylan in closer. His free arm warps itself around Dylan's middle as he rests his chin on his shoulder.]
I'd like to stay.
[There's no unspoken but hanging in the air. It's an offer just like the last and entirely up to Dylan if he wants to take Jaskier up on it or not. Either way, he will come back as he said he would.]
no subject
His instinct is to come up with a million and one excuses. Jaskier has a performance to get to. People would be disappointed if he didn't show up. And Dylan's room is a mess. But the way Jaskier holds him, there's something solid and supportive about it. He's here to keep Dylan from breaking and pushing Jaskier away would only prolong it. Even if Jaskier went to perform, he was going to come back. So if he's fine with skipping the performance entirely, Dylan will accept. ]
You don't have to...
[ His voice barely a whisper. It's just one last ditch attempt to give him an out. But after a moment, he nods and admits: ]
But I'd like that.
[ His smile is small as he turns in order to fit his key in the door and open it up. And then he turns back toward Jaskier to await his decision -- a decision he's pretty sure he knows what the answer to it will be. ]
no subject
[He notices all the locks on the door right away, of course. They are, after all, more or less impossible to miss. But Jaskier doesn't spare them any more than a passing glance and says nothing about them. Dylan likely already knows that those locks wouldn't be able to hold him if he were to transform in his room. And even if they could, the door itself wouldn't likely stand up to a werewolf at his full strength. But it's likely made him feel better, so there's little point in bringing it up and taking that small comfort away from him.]
[Similarly, Jaskier says nothing to the degree to which Dylan's room certainly feels lived in. While it's not exactly what Jaskier would qualify to be messy per se, there's a certain something that's difficult to articulate in its arrangement that speaks to it being occupied more hours of the day than not. Or perhaps that's not true at all, Jaskier thinks to himself briefly. It could be just his assumption is coloring his perception of the room, leading him to assume that's the case when that couldn't be further from the truth. Regardless, Jaskier says nothing about it and settles in with Dylan for several hours.]
[Several hours that are spent talking about nothing particularly important and curled up close with one another. At some point, Jaskier pulls out his lute and, with Dylan in his lap, teaches him a few chords. It's a little bit of a trick as it turns out since Dylan teased before he would be absolutely certain never to cover one of Jaskier's songs, but while playfully drilling Dylan on the chords, Jaskier puts them in the correct order for Toss A Coin and has Dylan play it again and again until it reaches both tempo and recognition. Jaskier allows Dylan the freedom to fiddle around with the lute for a while longer, letting him experiment with the sound until things fall quiet again for a time.]
[Jaskier stays as long as he can with Dylan, but there comes the point where it's time for him to go because there are other promises that need upholding and that means he can't spend the night tonight. But he leaves with a kiss and a gentle reminder to not be such a stranger. Whether it's a simple text or spending time together, Jaskier makes it clear he wants Dylan around. At Dylan's pace as he feels ready for it, of course, but still around. Jaskier lingers for a few minutes longer much as he often does since he's actually quite terrible at even temporary goodbyes. But it allows Dylan to stay in the shelter and safety of his arms for just a little longer before Jaskier really does have to go. With one more kiss to Dylan's cheek and a promise to be there if Dylan needs him for anything, Jaskier takes his leave.]